Candy Cane Lane (12.22.23)

 Was there a bigger comedic superstar in the late 20th century than Eddie Murphy? Saturday Night Live, Beverly Hills Cop, Trading Places—even the earliest days of the 21st gave us his iconic turn as a magical talking CGI ass. And then he just kind of… disappeared. Then in 2021 Amazon evidently thought it was high time that he had a career resurgence with Coming 2 America, a sequel that no one was really asking for and, if the various review aggregate websites are to believed, most people didn’t particularly care for. Now the Amazon Eddie Murphy meh-naissance continues with Candy Cane Lane, a truly forgetful holiday film that is uneven, mostly unfunny, and a bunch of other not-great “un” words.

It takes what feels like a half hour for Candy Cane Lane to settle into its plot—that of a wish gone awry, a vengeful elf, and the Twelve Days of Christmas brought to life. By the time they actually got to things I was already bored, wishing that the movie had instead focused on one of the many other aspects of the plot that turned out to be backstory rather than the actual meat of the film. And then it keeps on going for another hour and a half. At the very least I was hoping for Eddie Murphy to say or do something funny, a hope that goes mostly unfulfilled as the two hours dragged on and on (although I must say that it was nice to see him give a more understated performance and that he pulls off the dad roll quite well). Jillian Bell, who plays the aforementioned vengeful elf, is the only person that is consistently amusing, as is Timothy Simons in his bit part of a jaded newscaster. Sure, others try to make you laugh, but it just doesn’t work most of the time, as the writers and actors often seemed to confuse being loud with being funny. The group of sentient miniature porcelain figures is particularly insufferable, their only actually amusing quality being the novelty of hearing Nick Offerman speak with a British accent.

Sometimes Candy Cane Lane is a corny family drama as Murphy’s character grapples with his kids growing up and having thoroughly cliché and uninteresting kid problems. Sometimes it’s a wacky find-the-MacGuffin treasure hunt. It’s about not envying others, it’s about family, it’s about spreading Christmas joy, it’s about everything, which kind of dilutes the messages and meaning. Hallmark Christmas films may be a dime-a-dozen and they may be as equally as forgettable, but at least they have an endearing kind of cheese that makes some people feel the holiday spirit. Candy Cane Lane is as corporate and algorithmic as you can get; just like the porcelain figurines in this film seem to mistake volume with humor, the makers of Candy Cane Lane seemed to believe that stuffing their movie full of pretty lights and classic Christmas songs is the same as filling it with genuine heart.

If you’re looking for some holiday fun this season I recommend looking elsewhere.

Candy Cane Lane is now available on Amazon Prime.

 

This review was first published in the Keizertimes on December 22^nd, 2023. Visit at www.keizertimes.com. 

Doctor Who 60th Anniversary Specials- The Star Beast and Wild Blue Yonder (12.08.23)

 

The British have an interesting habit of keeping the runs of their television shows short and sweet, a practice that seems antithetical to the American way of doing things. In this, Doctor Who is undoubtably an outlier—a British television staple that has been an almost constant presence since it premiered in the early 1960s. Yet despite its impressive streak, Doctor Who endures because it is constantly refreshing itself, offering new beginnings and opportunities for the curious to hop on and become fans. In this spirit it was announced last year that everyone’s favorite Time Lord would find new life in the States at Disney+, starting with the three-part 60th anniversary celebration. As of this review two of them have been released, The Star Beast and Wild Blue Yonder, and while these episodes are probably a little more difficult for newcomers to completely comprehend than they should have been there is no doubt that they will win over some new hearts.

Well, Wild Blue Yonder will, anyway. The Star Beast is a bit rougher, if still endearing in that cheesy way that only Doctor Who can pull off. While it is still thoroughly a BBC production, it is obvious that The Star Beast had some of that Disney money behind it that it wanted to flex, leading to a more action-packed adventure than usual for the Doctor, which in and of itself isn’t a bad thing. But the main plot revolving around the titular star beast is bland and uninspired, and perhaps even more questionable is the fact that the episode chooses to resolve a big ongoing plot point that was introduced all the way back in 2008. As a relatively longtime Whovian I found this resolution incredibly unsatisfying, and I’m sure that newcomers will be completely baffled no matter how many let’s-catch-you-up conversations and recaps there are.

Wild Blue Yonder, on the other hand, is classic Who. I’ve always felt that the show was at its best when it was smaller, more thoughtful, and even a little creepy. The sci-fi elements and the core mystery are satisfactorily compelling, and even though a past episode or two are alluded to it doesn’t feel like you need to go back and do some homework to understand things moving forward. Perhaps the best part of this episode is the fact that it takes the time to slow down a bit and focus on David Tennant’s Doctor and Catherine Tate’s Donna Noble, two fan favorites whose return was one of the main selling points of the anniversary specials. They are as fun to watch as ever, neither missing a beat as they step back into roles that they haven’t inhabited in years.

Six decades and fifteen actors later the future of Doctor Who looks as bright as it ever did. Jump on in, if you’re curious. The fandom's warm.

The first two Doctor Who 60th anniversary specials are now available on Disney+. A third one will release on December 9th followed by a fourth on Christmas Day.

 

This review was first published in the Keizertimes on December 8^th, 2023. Visit at www.keizertimes.com.

 

Note: when this was published the third special had not come out yet, but as of the repost on my blog it is now available.