Scream 7

 

If Ghostface ever rang me up and asked me what my favorite scary movie was my options would be very, very limited (although the answer would be Alien). I’m kind of a coward when it comes to horror, but over the last few months I discovered that the Scream movies are not actually all that scary as I slowly fell in love with them. I’m far from the first person to make this comparison, but many of the films play out less like actual horror and more like violent Scooby-Doo episodes or modern-day whodunits with a cheeky attitude. After catching up on the first six over a period of a few months, Scream 7 is the first one that I have actually caught in the theaters. It is also the first one that I didn’t like.

After (rightfully) sitting the last one out because she was offered less money than she’s worth, Neve Campbell is back for this round and making the appropriate amount of bank as Sidney Prescott, the perpetually stabbed survivor of far more Ghostface attacks than are probably healthy. And thank goodness she is, because she and Courteney Cox as Gale Weathers are definitely the best part of Scream 7, a film that doesn’t feature any other interesting  characters. As a slasher series, Scream has always had to constantly introduce new faces for the sole purpose of rounding out the body count, but previous films at least saw to it that we knew at least a tiny bit about some of these people before they were offed. In Scream 7 I simply did not care for anyone not named Sidney or Gale, and that includes the Meeks-Martin siblings (played by Jasmin Savoy Brown and Mason Gooding), veterans from the previous two films that I like but were given absolutely nothing to do in this one. As for the customary third-act bad guy reveal, all I can say is that it is by far the worst, most asinine, and least impactful one yet, and it’s not even close.

Scream 7 was directed and written by Kevin Williamson, and it’s ironic that I found his directing much more competent than his script, as he also wrote the screenplays for the original Scream, Scream 2, and Scream 4, all of which I enjoyed quite a bit. There are some pretty creative deaths in 7, and a couple of shots of Ghostface will stick in my mind for a while. But not only does the screenplay not allow for any interesting characters, it also doesn’t feature any of the sharp wit or dark sense of humor that its predecessors had in  varying degrees. Not even the meta commentary that Scream is famous for feels right here; Scream 7 doesn’t have anything new or interesting to say at all, not about the horror genre and not about anything else. It really is a testament to the general high quality of the other five sequels (even 3, which I like more than most people) that it has taken this long for the series to burn itself out.

It is high time that Sidney was given the rest that she deserves and this series was put on hold, but that’s not going to happen any time soon as 7 has had the best opening week of any Scream film to date. It’s a shame that such a mediocre entry has that distinction, and I guess the best we can hope for is that the next one won’t suck as much.

Scream 7 is now playing in theaters.

Eternal Sunshine on the Spotless Mind (2004) Mini Review

 

To be a 10/10 in my eyes, a film needs three things-- it needs to elicit an emotional response, keep my attention and interest from start to finish, and I shouldn't be able to find anything to complain about. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is, to me, a 10/10 movie. The story is painful, touching, and ultimately sweet. I am, admittedly, a sucker for unconventional story structure, and it doesn’t get more unconventional than this (a lot of the film takes place in the realm of memories/dreams and goes backwards from scene to scene Memento-style for a bit, among other oddities). It’s one of those films that demands your entire attention lest one become confused, and though it happened to me a couple of times everything became clear at the end and the experience was all the richer for jt. The acting in Eternal Sunshine is superb—it’s one of those “serious Jim Carrey movies” that shows off the comedian’s dramatic chops, and the fact that Kate Winslet singles her performance in this film out as her favorite shows that she has impeccable taste. As for complaints, well, I initially thought that the small storyline of Elijah Woods's characters was unneeded, but when I really thought about it I saw that it enhanced the main narrative in a subtle way and wasn’t superfluous after all. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind is, in my eyes, one of those few movies that reaches perfection even as the characters constantly fail at it. Highly recommended.

GOAT

 

In 1997, the documentary Air Bud broke the shocking story of a dog who had learned how to play basketball. The loophole that allowed the golden retriever to help the Timberwolves triumph in the championships was closed as soon as the series stopped being lucrative, and Buddy “Air Bud” Mankowitz was forced into an early retirement just as he was hitting his stride. But you can’t keep a good boy down, and eventually Buddy spread knowledge of basketball to the rest of the animal kingdom, and thus “roar ball” was born. That’s how I choose to believe the backstory of GOAT goes, anyway. It’s a kids’ movie about animals playing basketball, and that’s all the backstory you really need to know.

Calling the animal version of basketball “roar ball” is dumb. Naming the trophy that the champions win “The Claw” is also dumb. These two phrases are indicative of the general uninspired nature of GOAT—the plot is predictable and the messages of believing in oneself and working as a team are pedestrian and basic. But this doesn't make it a bad film; it just makes it a safe one.

Created by the same team that did the Spider-Verse films and K-Pop Demon Hunters, GOAT is very much in the same style and is just as visually stunning as those movies. The exaggerated action on the basketball court reminded me of Space Jam, and in some ways GOAT is just that for a new generation. Well, no, that’s not a fair comparison, because really GOAT is far superior. For one, its stunt casting of a basketball legend works much better, as Steph Curry shows more aptitude for acting than Michael Jordan ever did, and the character in question is not the focus of the film. It lies instead on Will, a goat (surprise!) with hoop dreams who is voiced by Caleb McLaughlin of Stranger Things fame and Jett, a panther/fading star with something still left to prove voiced by Gabrielle Union. These are just two of many familiar character archetypes found in GOAT, and they don't really get any more creative than that.

GOAT tells its basic story with its basic characters well, though. What the story lacks in originality it makes up for in heart, and my nephew said that if he had his way, he'd put this movie above Zootopia 2 in his own personal ranking (why he wouldn't have it his way I have no idea… the mind of a nine-year-old is a mystery to me). Sometimes a kids’ movie doesn’t need to be super complicated; sometimes it just needs to do its job well, and GOAT does its job just fine.

GOAT is now playing in theaters. 

 

Stranger Things Season 5

 

Few shows have reached the zeitgeisty level that Stranger Things did in its heyday. Ten years ago the Christmas lights/alphabet combo was everywhere and Eggo's were surging in popularity. A few years after that and Kate Bush's 1985 hit “Running Up That Hill” was suddenly charting again, much to the surprise of Bush herself. Sure, hype for the series has ebbed and flowed over the years-- it’s kind of inevitable when you spread five seasons across ten years—but overall the Duffer Brothers' throwback horror series has become iconic. But all good things must end, and season 5 resolves everything satisfactorily, if not perfectly.  

Stranger Things has always had to juggle a lot of characters, and nowhere is this balancing act more apparent and strained as it is in the final season. Jonathan (Charlie Heaton) and Mike (Finn Wolfhard) are the biggest casualties of writer neglect this time around, but Mike at least gets a lot of focus in the second half of the very last episode while Jonathan’s only interesting scene involves a relationship that I haven’t cared about for a good long while. Everyone else has a nice moment or two that serve to remind viewers of why they love these characters even when things get crazy, although once again the most engaging relationship is the one between Dustin and Steve (Gaten Matarazzo and Joe Keery), although the maturing romance between Max and Lucas (Sadie Sink and Caleb McLaughlin) is definitely a contender, though Will (Noah Schnapp) has the most interesting journey overall.  

With all these well-developed characters, the Duffer Brothers really lucked out when it came to casting the inaugural season. Who would have guessed that these kids would grow up to be acting powerhouses that could handle the challenging material written for them a decade later? This eye for talent has clearly not faded, if the performance of newcomer Nell Fisher as Holly (a background character up until now) is anything to go by, not to mention the absolutely chilling work by Jamie Campbell Bower (who was also in the last season) as one of the big bads.  

Despite the strong performances and writing, Stranger Things season 5 isn’t quite as good as its previous seasons because somewhere along the line it lost the spooky small-town charm that made the series so memorable in the first place. This evolution into a more action-oriented “let’s team up and save the world” kind of a plot might have been inevitable as characters become more competent and more aware of what’s going on, and naturally the battle with the denizens of the Upside-Down had to come to an explosive head eventually. But often I wished that the show would dial it down a bit, particularly in the ludicrous final battle that feels more like a superhero movie than anything else. And speaking of the final battle, what a disappointment the main bad guy turned out to be after years and years of build up. Not only is it laughably easy to defeat, but if you want the full backstory of Vecna and the Mind Flayer you have to apparently see Stranger Things: The First Shadow... a play on Broadway.  

And while we’re talking about finales, there is no doubt that season 5 plays it super safe as if the Duffers are trying to upset the fewest people possible rather than writing something truly inspired. As Max says, “Comfort and happiness? Can you be more trite?”  However, happily-ever-afters and/or noble sacrifices are always appreciated. 

As big and unwieldy as this show has become it is frankly a miracle that the Duffer Brothers and everyone involved were able to land the plane as successfully as they did. Not everyone will be happy with how things turn out... how could that possibly happen when people are so attached to this show and its characters? All I can say is that for me it was a good end to a great journey.  

Stranger Things season 5 is now streaming on Netflix.  

My Top 10 Films of 2025

 

I thought about skipping this list this year, as I did not watch nearly as many new releases as I have in years past and still have lots of 2025 films that remain on my to-watch list. I have only watched 16 as of this moment, in fact, so being in the top 10 is only kind of a compliment for some of these. On the flipside, I have only seen one 2025 film that I have truly disliked, and even that I can’t hate because my nephews and other enthusiasts love it (Minecraft). I also realize that a lot of these picks are basic white boy selections... 3 comic book movies, 2 Predator movies, and not a single one from an indie studio, up-and-comer, or fancy film festival. Oh well. These are the movies I enjoyed most from 2025 (so far):

 

(Note: number 5 is the only one I haven’t already written a review for, so it is the only one that I am including justification for. If you want to see what I liked about the other 9, well... read the reviews)

 

10. Predator: Killer of Killers

9. The Fantastic Four: First Steps

8. Thunderbolts*

7. Predator: Badlands

6. Superman

5. The Phoenician Scheme

Before this I had only ever seen Asteroid City out of all of Wes Anderson’s many films (along with the Roald Dahl shorts), and this was by far the better movie. Asteroid City felt listless—a plot with too many inconsequential side characters, no clear narrative, and inscrutable fantasy moments that felt pretentious without true meaning. The Phoenician Scheme, on the other hand, stuck to one story and three primary protagonists, the plethora of famous faces that usually make up Anderson’s ensemble casts all came and went as needed, always serving the plot, and the fantastical moments were easy to digest and appreciate. The Phoenician Scheme is quirky, pretty, and wonderfully acted and directed, which should be no surprise to anyone who likes Wes Anderson. It doesn’t reinvent the wheel or anything... even just two movies in I can tell that Anderson has a formula that is tried, true, and omnipresent. But unlike Asteroid City this one has me wanting to experience more of that formula for myself.

4. Frankenstein

3. Wake Up Dead Man

2. Sinners

1. One Battle After Another

 

2025 films on my list that I have yet to see that may very well knock some of the above out of their spots in the future- Marty Supreme, Wicked: For Good, Avatar: Fire and Ash, Ballerina, 28 Years Later, The Naked Gun, Caught Stealing, Roofman, Rental Family, The Long Walk, Is This Thing On?, The Running Man. Like I said... I still have a lot to get to.  

Wake Up Dead Man (2025)

 

When it comes to whodunits, some people find immense satisfaction in trying to figure out the mystery as the story unfolds before them as if they themselves were the detectives. I am not one of these people. I’m simply not creative or observant enough, but I still experience that rush when everything is laid bare, the guilty parties are brought to light, and the methods at last become clear. Not a lot of movies offer such moments these days, but Rian Johnson and Daniel Craig continue to scratch that neglected itch with their modern-day detective series featuring Craig as Benoit Blanc, a Foghorn Leghorn impersonator with a penchant for mysteries that involve people that make you say “Hey, it’s that person!” Wake Up Dead Man is better than Glass Onion and is almost as good as the original Knives Out… the only thing holding it back is a lack of fun and interesting side characters, something the original had in abundance.

Not that anyone is bad in Dead Man… the acting is, in fact, one of the strongest factors of the film. Josh O’Connor in particular steals the show as Father Jud, and the day that actors like Glen Close and Josh Brolin produce lackluster performances will be a cold one in hell indeed. The thing is, while the suspects in Knives Out were awful people, they were at least entertaining. In Dead Man, they are either Benoit Blanc, Father Jud, the local sheriff (Mila Kunis), or someone who is downright unpleasant and not terribly interesting to watch. Again, this is not an acting problem, nor is it a writing problem. The fun factor of the characters is not even a problem at all, really, or at least not an objective one; it just makes for a less enjoyable watch than the other two films in the series.

This darker turn is further propelled by Dead Man's exploration of real-life problems, like the ease at which some people can use faith to justify abhorrent behavior and the dangers of cults of personality. True, Knives Out did not shy away from reality either (did Glass Onion? I don’t know, that one didn’t stick with me nearly as much) but this one still feels darker somehow.

Wake Up Dead Man also does something that I think is very undervalued in the mystery genre: it has plenty of twists and turns but never overcomplicates things for the sake of surface-level cleverness. It is my belief that some writers are, consciously or subconsciously, terrified of simplicity, thinking that just because the dumbest of their audience (me) may understand everything, the story itself is unintelligent. I followed Dead Man just fine, yet it is far from being a point A to point B story. It is complicated, but not excessively so.

Time will tell if the relative lack of fun will place it below the original Knives Out, but there is no denying the craft and skill that went into Johnson’s latest headscratcher. Cleverly written, superbly acted, and deftly directed, Wake Up Dead Man is everything that a mystery fan could want.

Wake Up Dead Man is now available on Netflix. 

 

Frankenstein (2025)

 

Guillermo del Toro is a man who loves his creepy creatures, so it should come as no surprise that back in 2010 he described Mary Shelley's Frankenstein as his favorite novel in the world. Over the years he has mentioned the book numerous times, citing it as his dream project, but dreams can be scary in a way. In his own words,  

 

“Frankenstein to me is the pinnacle of everything, and part of me wants to do a version of it; part of me has for more than 25 years chickened out of making it. I dream I can make the greatest Frankenstein ever, but then if you make it, you've made it. Whether it's great or not, it's done. You cannot dream about it anymore. That's the tragedy of a filmmaker. You landed a 10 or you landed a 6.5 but you were at the Olympics already, and you were judged.” 

 

I honestly don't know if del Toro’s Frankenstein is a 10 out of 10. Having not seen the 1931 Boris Karloff classic yet (it’s on my list) I can’t even say for sure whether or not it is the quintessential adaptation of everyone’s favorite corpse quilt and his overwhelmed single father. It is certain, however, that everyone involved in these metaphorical Olympics can go home being proud of what they’ve created, even if Victor isn’t.  

It has been a while since I have read the original novel, so I can’t speak to the accuracy of del Toro’s creation (I don’t think the Creature originally had Wolverine-like healing powers?), but all the important bits seem to be there—the God metaphors, the daddy issues, the existential questions of life, death, and the nature of the soul; furthermore, there isn’t an Igor to be seen anywhere. Frankenstein is a symphony of themes that plays beautifully, each note pitch perfect thanks to career-best performances from Oscar Isaac (Victor Frankenstein), Jacob Elordi (the Creature), and their supporting cast, as well as a script penned by del Toro himself that flows like poetry. The film looks gorgeous as well, with practical sets, sweeping shots, and vibrant colors that stand in stark juxtaposition to the unflinching gore and viscera that the story requires. The CGI in Frankenstein, on the rare instances where it is utilized, doesn’t look that great, so I am particularly glad that del Toro chose practical sets and effects whenever possible.  

I cannot say enough good things about the production design in this film. Shelley’s original work is one of the first stories that comes to mind when one hears the phrase “Gothic literature,” and the sets, creature design, and costumes in Frankenstein all evoke this heritage to a T. It is also all singularly del Toro, proving that this really was a project that he was born to do. Whether it is truly a 10/10 I can’t say yet, but it is definitely up there.  

Frankenstein is now streaming on Netflix.