Friday, October 25, 2024

House of Spoils (Unpublished)

 

It’s easy to freak people out with food. Just make a character eat something moldy or crawling with bugs and audiences will squirm, or present something delicious and reveal that, surprise, it’s actually the liver of a census taker that is spruced up with fava beans and a nice Chianti. House of Spoils, a new horror film from Blumhouse Television and Amazon, serves up some creepy culinary concoctions, but other than a few banal haunted house trappings it’s not all that scary and ends in the dumbest way possible.

Ariana DeBose gives a strong performance as the main character who is known only as “Chef,” an aspiring restaurant owner who comes to find that her new digs are haunted. Chef's story is considerably more interesting when it’s dealing with the harrowing yet decidedly non-supernatural realities of opening a new business and not touching on anything otherworldly, and DeBose and her supporting cast lend a strong core to a screenplay that doesn’t deserve the effort, especially because the characters are written so thinly. The actual ghost story bits are lacking, especially the resolution, which might just be one of the most baffling things I have ever seen in a horror film. The ghost's motivation seems downright silly if I understood it correctly, and the fact that I don’t know for sure speaks to a lack of clarity that smacks of bad writing rather than an invitation to thoughtfully ponder what was just shown.

When the film is utilizing tried-and-true horror techniques like the typical long, silent walk down a dark hallway that raises stress with every step because you just know that something is going to pop out at any second it works well enough. But tense moments such as these are almost impossible to screw up and are so omnipresent in the horror genre that it doesn't feel like I should give House of Spoils props for this, especially because I've always been someone who is easily scared. Horror aficionados might not even blink at these moments, especially because they never really pay off. Sometimes a spooky hallway is just a spooky hallway, and even when an old lady ghost is around the corner any resulting scare that might occur feels cheap. When it’s not offering spooky hallways and old ladies, House of Spoils leans heavily into the aforementioned food horror thing, which is more gross than anything else in this context. There are only so many times you can watch someone get surprised by an army of cockroaches in a soufflé before even this queasiness wears thin.

House of Spoils has a loose feminine message to it that I appreciate, even if it is vague, unfocused, and sloppy. It may be hard to be a female restaurateur in a man’s world, but this message gets lost a bit in the quagmire that is the rest of the film. If you’re looking for scares this Halloween season look elsewhere. You won’t find any in House of Spoils.

House of Spoils is now available on Amazon Prime.


This review wasn't published in the Keizertimes but you can visit anyway at www.keizertimes.com 

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